•¨•.¸¸❤ Ємιℓʏ: ᶫᵒᵛᵉ such an deep affection ❤¸¸.•¨•

From the day i met u, i just love u.

2012-02-21T02:28:00.004+08:00

31st Dec - The 3rd time i met u in club.

Was looking out for u bcos u texted me, haven seen u ard.
At a certain timing, u popping out of nowhere.

We danced just like we gonna have some cypher.

Then ur fren, pushed me to u & we danced tgt.

But we keep backing out bcos we afraid might play with each other.

Til then u kissed me, i was afraid, scared & yet still receiving kisses from u.
Wasnt certain are u a rite guy in my feelings.

3rd Jan - I actually went over to ur place.

We had a long conversations regarding our past.

So on, we jus continue texting. :)

7th Jan - We met up agn.

Drink, Drank, Drunk at Marv's place.

At certain timing, we cldnt slp & get up for early Mac Breakfast.

8th Jan - went to Marv's place agn.

Headed to town bought my Gong Cha, letting u had the 1st try & u liked it. :)

Trying to do my BTT for the following next day.

I asked u something ... ... Well to stayover..

We jus enjoying our's acc & fell aslp of cuddling each other.

9th Jan - My BTT.

Failed my BTT & u was waiting for me to complete.

We head to NEX for dinner & Gong Cha agn. ;)

Tt nite u just wished to come over to my place agn to cuddle me while slping.

& tt nite was the time i agreed to ur r/s propose. :)

Your just so happy when i accepted.

Silly Baby Boy...

Til today, we are still loving.

No quarrels, no arguements.

Just a slight conflicts?

We meetup everyday without getting bored of seeing each other.

Each day, our heart jus whispers to us.

We just fall for each other day by day more.

Wat im always loved to see in u:

- Your sudden random cute expressions

- Your addictations to me

- Your laziness

- Your big appetite

- Your unglam slping poses

- Our long conversations

- Your ........

Just everything.. :)

Baby, i never dare to say tis.

U're just in my life now, if 1 day we ever got seperated, i wldnt noe how will tt even be like or feel like.

I just love to have u in my life for long.

I love u.

Agn im back.

2012-02-02T11:38:00.001+08:00

Hate some of things going on.
I lost 2 frens along the way when i found a love.

Now things had changed.
Yet still being a slacker of doing nth daily other than having a loves acc & dance.
While on the other hand, tweeting all those love confessions & ppl got irritated?
Honestly, ppl have diff ways of saying it out, y cant jus let them be?
Not as in everyday confessing too...
Im seriously cant get tis thinking working out.
R u guys being jealous or envious?
Now i jus think u guys r really stupid, making things in public, purposely showing it to me in a indirect way.
I was f**ked, speechless but i doubt i, myself can rest tis matter.
Thanks man. For knocking Me out.

Emo cant be tweeted, love also cant be tweeted, u guys jus go eat shit.
All tis r suppose to be part of daily stuffs too.

Look forward, move on, jus smile.

2011-11-13T19:22:00.001+08:00

Wat i had been muddling tis days, jus a lil too much whereas im single & jobless.
Mind wants a love but heart doesnt seems to be ready despite been seeing the old foot tracks.
Falling in love is a lil way too fast, haven get to noe the partner alr gt lil upset for him. Funny huh?
Im jus always belief tt im nt the only gal he can consider on.
There must be plenty gals r much better than me.
I noe, dun have to make it sounds so nice.
Like me, i also cld consider on other guys too.
Thing is i jus fear of the guys now, hate too.
1st thing they like gals jus for the sake comes & goes only, once date once or twice, jus sex wit the gals.
Yes, we gals didnt rejected tt. Some r born to be bitch, can always hop to another's but some jus being slightly possesive, start to tail on the guy's movement.
I noe r/s dun happen 1st now, it's like sex 1st b4 r/s.

We humans jus likes to make mistakes.
Tt's imperfect is born on every1.

Alot of times, i wan to ask or tell to tis some1 but i jus cldnt pick the courage to. My heart jus sank further.
Im jus a unknown, i clearly noe tt which i dun tok much ab myself.
I jus used to bottle it up & let it kill me silently.
Who even noe? Noe tt I do actually wan to cry it out? No1...
I dun say i have any mishaps.
But my heart jus tired, lookin for some1 tt i cld lean on awhile.

It's been more than 3 mths....

2011-11-09T04:44:00.001+08:00

Time flies. How r u?
It's been more than 3 mths alr.
U noe who m i referring. Tot our r/s only like 8mths, still often comes my mind.
Marv, Will did asked me ab u.
I ans tt we haven been contacted since then.
Noe-ing the wishes ur parents wan u settles ur studies, i jus think i shldnt bother u anymore.
Til the extend, i nv been rite, nv treat u as pirority.
Cos i seen myself cared my frens more than u.
They r impt to my life, u noe.
They loved me for who i m.
Im sorry tt i jus let it passed bcos of tis issues, often.

All i ever jus hope u r doin gd... Without me, yes.. I noe u will...
Find a gal who will nv be in my ways.
If u ever will, u noe u have my blessings.
For real.
Do tc & be positive. :)

How are you?

2011-10-18T02:19:00.001+08:00

The finest sentence always ask ppl ard & ppl askin me. Im gd, my heart is still doin the same, movin on step by step. Realised a lot great mistakes i done. Im jus awfully shy person when u 1st c me but i can be chatative & funny if u noe me along the way. I wants to get a love, yes i hate to say tt i really selfish, always nd a rely. But i have to be on my own now to get better & become better.
Back 3 mths ago, he always told me i nv did change & understand y my ex saying such things at me. True enough, always stand by myself & think im rite when im nt, jus a petty stubborn immature kid.
Mature spells when we understand such situations & nt keep doin such things, yet i did nt. Nv changes at all. Still doin it to provoke ppl ard, think highly of myself, always being keepin all those negatively to impact ard.
I hate tis, im always nt myself when comes to thinking.
Being strong is jus another word, another self of how i manage to pull tis thru & put a tots for others. Im silly, stupid.

Im back wit my pics

2011-09-21T03:18:00.001+08:00

Post Created Jul 22, 2011 11:13:12 PM

2011-07-22T23:13:00.001+08:00

Do not breakdown now. I cant, at tis very moment. Bless him is wat i can now.

My last words on blog

2011-07-01T01:51:00.001+08:00

不可以哭，今晚过后要忘了他。 Congratualations, u jus made my heart breaks & feelings went dead on me.

A Sweet Kitty - Puss in Boots in real life!

2011-07-01T01:12:00.000+08:00

Y are you so CUTE? You lil fluffy jus make me smile!!

Gone & Dead

2011-07-01T00:57:00.002+08:00

My heart shatters when the moment ... ...

I wont cry, I wont be soft hearted agn.

Thank u.

Heart, do not die on me pls.

2011-06-30T22:18:00.002+08:00

A sudden pain & ache.

I noe i shld look forward.

I nd to accomplish tasks ahead in my life 1st.

Things cannt be change alr.

He dun see anything gd in me neither i treat him better.

Everything jus seems to become impossible.

"I will really be gone for gd since u nv chase me back for me once, not even now..."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

11.11:

Heart getting miserable, losing all my feelings. Jus wan to collaspe & slp but i cant.

I told tis myself tt he do not love me anymore bcos he wldnt even bother look at me neither chase me back.

Wat's the point of me saying tis when i have alot of flaws too....

Im done, it's really tearing me up...

I have to seek a new way

2011-06-30T21:25:00.002+08:00

Went for interview.
Was nervous but still alrite.
Got sudden thoughts tt im living alone in my own world actually.
I got so tired yet trying to accomplish things now tis days.
I have successfully control the temptation of smoking now & clubbing too.
Ppl may not belief, it's okie cos i noe i shld jus keep tis going instead of bother wat ppl say.
Im gonna join dance competition in aug. I wish to outake myself & show myself i can done better.
Also, if i start work, im gonna earn hard for the travels, return wat i owe my father's “debts”.

Emily, Jia You! 就算剩下只我最后一个，我也要镇做。

It's all clear

2011-06-29T23:00:00.003+08:00

I tot he was tt petty when he cldnt take jokes.
Sensitive? I jus said some guys can give a act cute voice.
He asked who? I said sissy.
Then he tot tis is wat i c in him.
So nxt time when i trying to be funny, i shldnt act like a clown in front of u.
So i'll jus shut the damn hell up!

Ur point of view my point of view is diff.
Pls get it rite.
Last wk i broke up wit u cos u insulted me, making stories tt i did not done.
Attitude was given when i felt lonely. U dun be outrageous change my story.
U shld noe y i break up wit u.
Seriously we totally not compatible.

U dun have trust on me u expect me earn it back in short time?
How?
Yes, i got faults, got pissed over small stuffs argued like stupid.
But u?
Do u actually understand where's ur faults at too?
Y r u expecting we will totally be okie after each breakups, arguements?
We still rake up the past.
How long can tis go?
How far can it goes?
How worse can another breakup be?
Y dun u jus try ans my tis quest b4 making stories.

U mentioned i copied u, y cant u copied me?
So watever i done despicable stuffs, r u going copy too?
Aint u hate copycat as much as i do??
U made me learn tis, i will jus read frm wherever u written dwn but i wont wan explain to u agn.
Cos im really tired of being initiative to tok to after every most of the arguements & i did explained some of the times, u jus dun belief and pick tis back at me.

All had become pain

2011-06-27T01:22:00.002+08:00

2day went over to his place.
Been slping most of the day, no idea wat's wrong wit my body.
B4 i left, he wanted pass me 紫菜，asked me wan to take?
I was paused awhile & think back.
To the recent tt he said i only fancy rich guys & frens gave him tis equation no $$ = no love.
I was like give up. Sigh...
Then another is will he suddenly said "give me back all my stuffs, do u understand eng anot?!" All he jus cared ab his stuff after breakup.
Here i am, lost...

It's not over yet?

2011-06-25T06:41:00.001+08:00

Been feeling chest pain recently & ....
Ytd i went over his area.
Said tok ended up argue in the 1st place, we even shouted each other in public.
After tt, rmb-ing wat Vania said.

Everythings went okie.
Then he asked me agn, the quest & he told me his ans tt he do not wan to break.
But i did not ans. Cos .... ....

I have to admit after tis 2nd or 3rd time breakup, felt worse.
Start to fear.
He wont be able trust me anymore neither might put respect on me.
On tis meeting, he alr returned all my stuffs.
Gave me a thinking of :"I dun wan to left anymore stuff at his place neither stay overnite".
It trembles me til now.

I dun deny tt i dun wish to breakup to.
But after been thru tis, if we gone back to each other, i jus feel like distance myself a lil frm him.
Think of all tis jus hurts alot.
Do i even look true to him?
Y will he still wants to love me?
你知道吗？这次的伤害真的太大了。
I can understand u have it too esp when reading tis.
Jus somehow rmb-ing when u jus asked me to collect my stuffs.
Thinking im always lie to u.
Then jus i asked "when?".
U ans "how will i noe?!".
痛，真的很痛。
我的胸口既然会那么痛。。

Im sorry for how i mistreated u, using past impacts as an excuse.
But tis time, i might really nd lil time to recover.

Once agn...

2011-06-23T23:19:00.002+08:00

Sigh..
I have no idea wat to tok ab tis but 2mr it's gonna be a tough day for us to settle once for all.
Told Vania ab treatments i treated u, wat she meant was rite.
Wat i been hurt over in the past & inpacted on me, shldnt treat u tis way too.
In fact i shld treat as normal & be glad to have ppl who mistreat u.
Absolutely a wrong way of doing it.
Y she told me tis. Bcos she been treated tis way b4, so she noe the pain & anger of it.
Same for tt, she noe it's seems an excuse to do tt.
Ab the rest, 2mr we will noe & settle it.
I jus wan an ending to end okie & normally.

Heartaches but nd too move on, still.

2011-06-23T14:47:00.002+08:00

It's a confirm.
It's done.
We had enough wit each other.
When u asked "Do u really wan to break?"
How am i suppose to ans when on tweet, i mentioned breakup.
U still expect me to ans u when u may have the chance to shoot me.
I did asked for a proper tok & frm there, we cld decide properly, nt in r/s status but a in-btwn.
So we cld tok it all out properly.But nvm now.
Ya, i guess tis is the final now.
Gonna move on & get over tis.I am not a better person now but im gonna be the nxt time.Heartaches occur now but soon, will fade...

Gd luck to u & bye, so long...

Pics was jus only took last wk & everything's gone

2011-06-22T02:11:00.002+08:00

All tis will always be memory, nth more, nth less......

It's over agn

2011-06-22T01:22:00.002+08:00

We met since 9 mths.
Argued every wk.
But i still love him.
It jus tt we completely not compatible to each other.

He said i like rich guys when i dun at all.
He said i always tend to have guys ard in my life when my attention is only on him & toks ab him all the time.
He said i always lied to him whereas i being honest to him 85% of the time, it's only there was thrice i lied to him tt i was at home.
He said i always badmouth him but ya, somehow it is. Jus tt i showed my frens the facts in the sms & they only listen the side of my story.

I dun fake sympathy ard my frens.
They noe who i am.
They accept who i am.
They will still get angry of wat i had done or said but still loves me as a fren.

I have to call tis quit, end tis r/s.
We cant stand each other, we hate each other.
To him, im a bitch,
To me, he's like a gal in the r/s.
Harsh huh?
I noe i said more than tt.
But tis is the most ridiculous r/s i ever been.
When he confessed tt he regret.
Concluded: NO $$ + NO R/S = NO LOVE or NOBODY WANTS.

Stupid conclusion, seriously.
Im grateful tt u paid most of my meals.
Appreciated tt ur parents treat me well.
Im sorry for tis but not for ur "make-up" judgement on me.

Now i truly wish u all the best & bless in studies & a new better gal.
(Jus to put in a better tone, dun meant anymore wars)

& ya..
I really do not wish to see u neither tok to u.
Bcos i just cant stand u anymore.
I will not look back anymore, i will jus move on.
Pls DUN ASSUME i find a new guy when i do not.
My consciene is clear okie?
I do not done anything unfaithful to u, get tis rite!

Im gonna be stronger, more independent.
I really in need to change for a better person,
(I noe im a sucky person).
Loving u is hard but gt to get on wit tis.

& i still rmb tis.
I ever asked tis quest so many times.
"Wat do u see in me?"
Ans i gt frm u is
"I dun noe."

Ya, it does not matter anymore.
I wont hold back anymore.
Be rest assured, i wont let u entitle anymore bad treatments.

Thank u for ur wasted 9 mths on me & all those efforts tt make u so regretted on me.
U can move on & dun have to think ab me anymore.
I will not be in ur life anymore, dun worry.
Be happy & take care.

He said i have hell bad attitude, yes i do have it.

Lady Antebellum - Just a Kiss (New Music 2011)

2011-05-13T01:04:00.000+08:00

I cant live without him

2011-05-13T00:39:00.000+08:00

As always, i done a big grave mistakes.
A dumb dun repent her mstakes, still cont doing.
At very tis moment...
I dun wanna leave him.
I noe im stubborn..
Im selfish..
But baby boy, i dun wan leave u hanging agn.
Not for the chances i nd.
But a beautiful ending i wish to create wit u.
How far we go, does nt matter,
Bcos i dun wan u to be alone anymore.
Im here. If u willing open ur arms for me agn.

I cant be ur best, cant be ur gd gf.
But i jus wan to be a gal u can still love on.

I hate myself for hurt or upseting u earlier..
Nt jus earlier, alot of times..
I breakdown agn, realising ur the guy i cant live without.
I dun wan miss tis opportunity..
Nt using tis opportunity to hurt u more agn but to give u love..
I wan to be ready wit u agn..
Starting tis whole new journey..

I wan to rebuild ur trust on me.
I wan to be conscious of wat i do tis time.
I wan to be by ur side, most imptly.
Tis time i dun give a damn on fren's advices.
Reason is only i still love u deeply..

U jus made me go deeper even u scolded me.
But u also made me fall when u decide nt to turnback anymore...
I dun wan to giveup on u, tis is wat i wan.
& u?

BC Jean - I'll Survive You

2011-05-13T00:35:00.000+08:00

Sugarland - Tonight

2011-05-13T00:33:00.000+08:00

Avril Lavigne - Wish You Were Here (Lyrics on Screen) NEW FULL SONG

2011-05-09T12:21:00.000+08:00

My blog will grow to dust once agn

2011-05-09T11:43:00.002+08:00

Wont be blogging really often anymore..
Twitter is where i now using the vent my anger on..
Tumblr will be the 1 i use my emotions on, how do i exactly feel..

The end for us is jus another cruel part.
Everything jus really nt meant to be?
Cried myself out the whole morning b4 i can get to slp..
But only for 4 freaking hrs..
Thoughts of how will he feel?
Better? Happier?
Mayb he still hates me..
I still rmb..
He said as long as he's living, he will hate me forever..
Even my stuff he jus threw out on the staircase..
Im jus his failure 1st gf & pretend-to-be..

How will u noe a person completely fine frm out of love?
Jus bcos they smile? Feel tt they enjoying?
Nt bcos they nd to hide the pain & smile in front of ppl?

Have u ever wonder tt i still thinkin of u?
Even during club...
Im nt all times happy..
Bcos i dun wan to be any other gals tt cry in front of ppl..

But ya, all ur remarks said on me is all true & i ans to my frens..
It's true..
Im nt tt Miss lil nice gal as they tot..
I also wan to become better... ...
I jus another typical gal as u think.....

Heart aches, eyes watery when the moment i c how we met...
The dates, the pics..
The things we suppose to do, guess is no longer valid anymore...
It's all gone..
Jus tt 1 particular nite & it's gone..

Marv, danny was rite..
During tis 1 wk, i indeed still holding lil hope..
But going back to the msgs, i noe everything is all gone for gd..
Tis is the best for us, i guess....
I jus wishes him all the best..
May u find a better gal who able give u wit a greater love & care..

Yet.... ......

2011-03-27T14:59:00.005+08:00

Sometimes i wan to noe y human emotions changes so fast..

1 side they can be caring & nxt moment can get v angry..

Ya.. I gonna critise an myself.. My mood always switches easily..

Im getting learnt not to bother too much cos i felt im wasting every mins of my life..

Tis is the life im living wit now, my emotions im spending wit now.

No matter how stupid or bad i said i am, i nt going to explain another word.

They judging frm ur appearance, ur actions & the words u said to them.

They dunnoe the inner how u felt, wat u have in the fear.

For a day, i nv love myself at all but i only cared ab the surface how i look like or act like.. Sacarstie rite? (Pardon me, i dunnoe how to spell it)

If to u, im a gal always filled wit all tis, nv change...

Y will u still wan to be wit me.......

Expectations? Sorry, im nt a perfect gal neither a gd gal..

But now i noe wat i can do & be myself..

Awful harsh words, bad foul attitude...

Ya i needa get tis change.

Like ppl said we'll get influnce of how they did..

Tt nite out of nowhere, i disappear when u guys go buy drinks.

Tt's bcos im also trying tok to u..

But over & over agn, u keep pushing me... Away frm u...

U said i dun spare any concentration to listen to u but ...

When i wan to, u jus keep pushing me away...

Maybe, u nd to tok to Marv..

U nd more opinions or advises...

Sorry is a cheap word tt countless been taking advantage of..

Ya... i keep using tt cos in another way i dunnoe use wat to express..

Bcos u seen the gd, bad & worse side of me while my frens dun..

( I heard tis frm some1 tt u told to)

Honestly i get lil mad but think ab it..

TRUE..

Ya... Tell me which frens will show it out?

They only show it out to the person who's closest & dearest to them..

Another time, my feelings for u was doubted agn..

I felt terribly upset...

I have to come honest wit tis past stories i had..

My ex loved me soo much tt he even love my flaws, my mistakes..

Jus cldnt accept i go clubs all the time..

He jealous of me going ard wit my guy frens like u do..

But 1 thing is no matter how bad i am, he accepted me.

I gave up on previous r/s bcos i noe he's way too gd for me..

I dun deserve to be.. I felt utimately guilty...

To u as well..

Blaming myself i took ur 1st sight away..

Im still under imperfectionst..

I do wan u to c the further side of me..

I dun dare to set in a r/s anymore...

Cos im scared to c the results of being single..

U noe the feelings.. It really sucks...

I dun wan u to be perfect..

Neither a guy whom i noe in my previous r/s..

But a guy dun doubt my feelings agn..

Im apologised for the cheap harsh words i said to u..

Back to the love.

2011-03-16T12:00:00.003+08:00

We are back tgt.

Wit my cute lil silly.

I never regret tis min

Walking in the rain

2011-03-14T15:24:00.003+08:00

Wat happened was really happens too fast.
Cldnt get my mind settle..
Reading ur last nite msg.
Saying i playing wit ur feelings & screw ur life.
Tt moment, heart aches.
Jus wanna find a place to exit & let the tears flow..

U have no idea..
U hurts me too..

Am i really such a person to u?
Last 2days after club, i gt soo happy & energetic cos everything's fine agn.
My mum was ponder wat's make me so happy.
Now, im back to space tt i dun dare to tok nor even face myself in the mirror..
The msg jus keep replaying.. In my mind..
Pain... Soo painful yet i have to hold my tears & frown in front of every1..

Cold in the mentality

2011-03-11T02:32:00.005+08:00

2day was a long day..
Was at IT Show earlier whereas he jus working nearby.
Told him i'll dropby but did not..
Smses when i asked, where is he..
He replied my fav hangout place..
Then there's a prt i'm actually pissed off..
" Dun act dumb leh. "
Not im acting dumb cos i really have no idea..

But think ab it, it did makes me wan to look for him..
Then ... ...
Even though we're jus frens, nicely tok shld b the way..
I was really tired.
To c all tis happened agn even though we're nt couples.
Still, it makes me worried.
I jus do not wan to take anymore initiatives..
It jus msg will do, all he have to do is type a simple text.

Reading the earlier post of his.
"If lying is a girl's nature, then fooling wldn't b a guy's nature too? "
I sinked at tt v moment.
Bcos watever he said, it seems tt tis is the gal i getting wit..
A wk alr & im still gonna crying for it.

I continued to move on is bcos i nd to belief myself to be a better person, not for any1 but for myself.
If i jus keep stucking at tt thoughts, i never go any further instead letting history repeats agn..

I noe im nt gd enough, nt worth for you.
Bcos i love you & i have to hold it back.

Decision is still ur's to make..
I alr said mine.
Continuing being frens 1st, get to understand each other's life, understand ur prt too..

Our time is nt ripe yet..
Now, It's all have to depends on whether we able to take 2 hands to clap agn..
I still misses you, it never been less..

Ayaka - Welcome home (Okaeri) Sub'd

2011-03-09T02:24:00.000+08:00

Dear mind

2011-03-09T02:01:00.003+08:00

You gotta be stronger...
You gotta think better... For others..
You gotta be more independent..
You gotta be happy too & think positive..

Earn lil trust frm family..
Let them c you can do better..

Frens, be wit them when they nd you, nt when you nd them.

Lover..
Let him have a lil trust & faith of you & wat your doing..
Like he said so b4 : words are cheap.
Do sth greater to life meaningfully tt you can be a better person..

Ready for the challenge

2011-03-08T00:50:00.003+08:00

Met up wit him 2day.
It hurts me in the starting when he no longer keep staring at me as he used to.
Told him ab earlier happening in train when a guy trying to molest me.
He placed his hand rite underneath my "bottom" & it's the front!
I was too shocked tt i nv done anything. Bcos the guy saw it & jus alight, walk str out fast!
Then i asked him when we got off at Orchard st.
He replied "Ohh.."
Then followed by " U said u noe how to protect urself, rmb? "
I'm speechless. Got upset..
Till we walked to spinelli tt time, we tok...

Ya, ... ..
We're still frens but we still wan to be tgt..
So i suggested tis to him..
I wan both of us to have even better understanding tis time.
Move on slowly b4 we start all over agn.
Despite being tgt agn but being as frens.
So we can tok out loudly frm our hearts.
No matter how ugly side we have, still have to confess it out.
Bcos frm there, we will mend ourselves & change.
As ppl noe, frens often be honest..
It's like giving advices, whether to take in anot, still up to ourselves.

Tis is the last chance.
If we cant change for a better nor even understanding enough, we will jus give up.
Somehow we noe, we once loved each other soo much & nt letting tis opportunitied to go agn.
Let's take tis test agn..
Becoming a stronger, better person than we once thought are....

Heart keep aching

2011-03-07T00:03:00.002+08:00

I nt supposed to cry out in front of my frens.
Bcos i get used to behave strong in front of their sight.
But once i'm home, my tears jus ...
Madly flow once agn.
Seeing every memories like wat you do to.

A sudden urge jus feeling stabbing myself.
I cant said tis in the sms.
I noe i must be okie.
I noticing too you do read my blog & profile.
Feeling the heart broken when both of us had really get going wit our life..

Nevertheless, i still loving here.
Standing here, waiting..
Awaiting the ans...
Will we find the other half better?
Will we be off better happier?

Im asking for meetup bcos i misses you..

Why...
Why... You dun even sms me?
You dun even ask me out...
It's v painful...
Holding it back.... Yet still thought of you..
Are you really happy now?

I realised...

2011-03-06T06:05:00.006+08:00

Realising i cldnt let it go...
Realising i cant get over you..
Tiis 3 days, i maybe busy wit frens, smiling laughing hard..
But as soon as when i wasn't, thought of you agn.
Seeing every details wat you done for me.

You surprised me wit pocky during our dates.
You noe i love veg, u always gave it to me.
You noe wat candies i love, you always buy it for me.

It's been only few days & i felt like a yr.
Since the last wed, i haven been seeing ur shadow ard.
Wishing to c you in club.
Wishing i can jus bump you on the str.
Hoping to receive ur msg too.
But i noe we dun have the courage to.
Afraid both of us will ruin the mood when sees the msg.
It jus keep holding me back when i want to..

It hurts..

Reading ur blog, seeing every details..
I cried..
So much things, i wan to do wit you.
Had become my wishful prt.

I misses you.. Real alot...
I jus feel like going up to you & give you a hug.
Are we gonna be okie?
Will you actually get over me someday?
Quests stuck in my head...

Somehow, i'll still wait...
Waiting for us to become better person...

450pm:
A day i nv meet up wit frens bcos they also have their stuffs to busy on.
I cant ease my heart down.
But i cant be so selfish.
I told myself: "if he dun even wan to reply you, wat for keep msg him? You only interrupt his living. ".
Then it aches agn..
I gonna get myself out frm tis place.
It only can hurts me further & worser when one nv speak to you anymore.

Hush Emily, do not cry.
You gonna be okie...

Love does not fade away in a day

2011-03-05T07:03:00.002+08:00

Back frm rebel & breakfast wit Marv, Danny & Will.
Ya, I had a great dance. Haven been long pespired so much.

But quest still comes to my mind.
" Is he alone now? " , " Is he still feeling upset? ", " Did he ever reminds the places we often walked tgt? ".
When earlier i was at suntec eating wit Hazel, i seeing our 1st few dates there.
I can still pic tt day i been taking my camera to take a pic wit him.
Walking the link tunnel frm Raffles Shopping Centre to Suntec also another traces tt i keep seeing.
Each time in club, when "Nothing On You" was played, he was the 1st to came into my mind.
Rmb-ing how he lift my head up & looked into my eyes, sings along it.

I maybe happy but some thing still there.
Misses how i always smses him, called him baby.
Misses how he always happy when seeing me.
It's all gone..
Our personality crushed.
I dunnoe ab when in future will we still b tgt?
Will we still be loving each other?
Will there be a possible we will patch?

I do not noe & i dun wan to make any of tis.
I jus wish to see if really there's a chance to restart all over agn?
Not now, not in tis period.
In a period we really have to look into ourselves, learning every each prt of the life.
Understanding more while we are in the position of frens.

I jus wish to say tis.
You still have my misses.

On a rainy day with a broken heart

2011-03-04T14:24:00.003+08:00

As we predicted.
Our r/s doesnt last.
Love's still there.
Pain jus adds on, jus keep going worse & even numb.
Im broken.. Once agn..
Broke out wit tears & yelling in my pillow.
Wit the music accompanied, emotional jus keep breaking out.
I have to be strong.
I told myself to hold back, not finding him bcos at the v moment.
So he wldnt be shaken to the change of decision.

All i nd to smile now.. But along wit my tears & pain hugging tight to my heart.
Be happy bcos we still have memories. not regretting being wit him.
Also not regretting having scars on my hand.
It may look ugly but sth i noe on tt v day, he cooked for me & surprised me wit a ferror rocher in the morning, taking pic when i'm aslp.

Tears madly flowed while i blogging tis post.
It's hard not to.
Shaking in fear... Shaking tt tis is really over..
Telling myself not to abuse myself, not to cover up the pain.

It's gonna be hard for us in tis few days..
Neither slp well or eat well...
Still wondering the other is missing?
Wondering is he happy?

Tis may not be the last post of im saying tis to him.
Maybe til the day he really forgets me...
Wanted to tell him in person tt I love him... Soo much tt i jus wan to run over hug him, seeing him the last time.
I doubt tis will nt come true agn.

Daryl, Be strong.
U may be much happier now, relieving tt i no longer bring u any trouble or prob.
For the past 4 months, it may appear to be a price for u to pay to be wit me.
But i glad once we noe, once we loved & once we noe our heart loving each other..
Tc boy, u'll be alrite.
Rmb ur still not alone.. Im still ard to be by ur side if u willing give me chance to be ur fren, jus a fren.
Smile all u can, as much as ur able to....

To my baby boy

2011-02-23T02:28:00.003+08:00

Baby,
You let me feel loved agn.
I fell in love wit you agn...
I loved to be in ur arms.
Not mind seeing me slping so ugly.
Not mind i occupied ur bed.
Not mind i snored. =x

Baby i love you.
Each day it grow stronger.
Each day it start to fear...
Of losing you 1 day.
You made me dream of future.
How will we look like, wat will we become.
I'm always mark tis inside my heart.
Jus bcos you taught me how to love..

Insane Me

2011-02-21T12:31:00.005+08:00

Who really m i.
How can i done so much evil things to him.
I felt i'm worse of all.
For the past few days, i thought everythings gonna be alrite.
Ride us peacefully thru the whole wk.
But arguements still happened.
Fight almost involved.

A tok wit him last nite.
Asked him to point out the faults tt lies on me.
Feeling i nv have changed b4.
Attitude still there, commanding & even awful words.
I dun dare to tok now.
He asked me for solution.
I dunnoe.
I jus need to cool off in tis few days.

I'm jus insane.
Crazy bitch.
I still dun understand myself.
Y m i doing tis....
Y m i hurting ppl, yet still smiling.
I underestimated of myself.
I need to find the ans of y.
I'm causing too much prob.
If i will have remain silent & tolerate,
None of tis gonna happen..

It's all my blame....
The gal who hides behind the mask.
Always hurting her loved ones.

I'm trying to change tis mindset of thinking.
Bcos the gal now unable do anything at all.
Unable brighten up his day.
Unable to make him feel loved,
Failed to make him smile......

Time is all i need to find myself & reflecting...

He cant do without me & I cant do without him

2011-02-18T00:58:00.003+08:00

Now we're getting inseperable. =x
Lovely-dovey.
We are also trying to keep our mind clear & cool, not to act on any impulsive manners.

Both of us clearly noe we unable to let each other go & yet every each of our arguement jus keep teaching us lil bit of sth.
Let me try harder... Try longer..
I'll become a better.

Baby I Love You & ... ...
Happy 3rd month-versary!
=)

Day by day, our love jus growing stronger

2011-02-11T00:20:00.003+08:00

We may happened to be always having conflicts.
Misleading words, being too emotional.
But 1 thing we clearly noe tt we are too unbearable to let go of each other.
Baby, forgive me tt i'm being too witful, selfish tis time.
Bcos i'm like you nt ready to let go yet.
I wan both of us leaving gd memories instead of all tis arguments giving us scars.

Baby, i'm still learning, still trying & also trying to change.
I love you baby.
You're always on my mind.
You're the only Silly, Yang Meh Meh i noe & in love wit..

Affected

2011-02-08T16:26:00.002+08:00

No mood.
Lost interest.
Tired.

Sigh.
I'm jus a obstacle tt i cant even get thru myself.
Negative minded once agn.
Exhausted.
Can i jus slp forever?

CNY

2011-02-06T15:47:00.002+08:00

Happy Hop Hop Yr!!!

2011-02-03T01:24:00.002+08:00

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YR!!!!!!!!
ANG BAO MORE MORE! HUAT!

CNY eve

2011-02-02T02:10:00.004+08:00

Start to clearing out some of my stuffs.
& also my negative thoughts.
Myself is a blame but i wishes to done sth better for myself,
Becoming a better self, Learn to love ppl ard me.

Believing to become better, stronger, lovable person.

To him, i'm sorry.
To my parents, i'm sorry.
To my sis, i'm sorry.
I'll walk tis out wit my bare hands, standing up on my feet agn.
Not Emily but Hui Li who is the gal able to give out smiles & love ard.

I'm dumb, useless.

2011-02-01T08:33:00.003+08:00

Dun worry, the word useless i add on myself.
Ya, all tis are frm me.
Y will i even said "if you said so.."?
Cos you mention on the comment.
"Baby, you seems to have it all" frm the link.
True.
I'm an imperfection.
I'm ugly.
I'm useless.
& I'm dumb.

I didnt get your words wrong, it's me who accumalate all tis on my self.
I'm carrying doubts on tis r/s bcos i felt we wldn't survive long,
Since you said i had ' tt everything '.
Change? It's not couple months thingy.
If i still gt the thoughts, it's hard for me to do so.

Forever, Ever-lasting are jus liars.
Fact is love we'll have to take our both hands to clap.
Ya, i did not raise mine to clap wit you.
& since i been given so many chances, ppl may think or myself shld think tt i dun deserve any more chances.
I guess maybe you can find a even better gal than i am.

I'm all to blame.
For stepping into ur 19yrs of loneliness.
Interrupt ur peace.
Making you do a dumb decision for falling wit me.
Now to think tt, i'm really not worth..
Not worth for you.
Bcos i'm always dumb, get everythings wrong & misplaced it....

Missing Everything

2011-01-23T00:28:00.006+08:00

Gt thru his phone.
But hanged up after tt cos i noe he may nt wan to tok to me neither see me.
I felt relief still cos he finally on his phone.. After 2 days long....

I'm not giving up..
But i also wont hold him back..
Instead i need to reflect my words.

I missing him so much now.
I'm envy of all the couples who are happily sweet.
I noe i had tt too but now ... ...
It jus cold...

I missing his big hands holding mine.
I missing his warmth.
I missing his hug.
I missing his kiss on my lips.
I missing his eyes looking at me.
I missing his voice.
I missing his smile.
I jus misses everything of him.

Why... Why am I always a cause of tis bad happenings...

B.o.B - Nothin' On You [feat. Bruno Mars] (Video)

2011-01-22T23:51:00.000+08:00

Tis song jus reminds me of him.
Cos in club, he jus looked at me & sing.
Tis always stuck in my head...

Emily's Breaking Down

2011-01-22T23:10:00.004+08:00

Watched the competition, felt inspired & it's dope.
Ya, felt glad tt 1 thing ab is my passion for dance never dies.
But... ...

Currently under construction minded.
Wonder shld i find him but Marv & Jason adviced NO.
They tok to me alot.
Asked me to give him a cooling period.
He gone missing cos of facing his emotional.
Day by day, i jus getting weaker.
No appetite, cant slp well.
I jus feel like bursting out my cries.
But I cant cos i chose to be strong, hold it back.
Bcos tt's wat i told ppl, i'm fine.
I'm okie, tis is me.
Baby, dun mind ab me.
Tis is the selfish being of me.
I wan you soo much, i need you soo much, i jus wan to hear your voice tt your alrite.
But I dun wan hold you back.
It's ought to be a cooling period for both of us understand & be better person.
I tend to always messed & ruin things ard.
I dun noe how to make it better.
Our emotional state only sinks us further... Deeper..
Nowhere we can find a place tt can vent it out.
Now i understand.
Marv & Jason are rite.

Forgive me..
I'm only capable to blame myself when comes to tis emotional prob.
But when comes to argument, i blame on ppl.
I'm jus such a idiot, not growing up lil kid.
Stupid is the word to describe me.
I'm sorry tt letting you love a very imperfect gal.
Who acts noe how to think, understand.
I jus realised i do not.
I nd to be reflect.
Wat i'm goin thru in past, noe how to handle the present & how to think for my future.
Wat is best for us, still yet to find out.

Woke up with tears & fear

2011-01-22T05:37:00.003+08:00

Restless, weak.
Suddenly jus came to realised tt i'm wrong agn...
My emotional took control.
He felt so upset of upon hearing my harsh words.
I'm sorry baby.
I done it agn.
When came to noe ur phone was off, i jus slp...
Slp nt to cry, slp nt to feel sad bcos it's all started wit me.
& I happened to have a nitemare.
It's so horrifying, you wldn't belief.
I see your in the car accident, lying unconsciously.
I woke up... With tears rolling down..
1st time... I ever felt so fear..
I jus keep calling, calling.
Til now it still stuck in my head.

I jus get up & out to look for you.
Yes, to your area to check whether you are fine, alrite.
But i cldn't get thru the call.
So i called the hse no. which divert to your dad's phone, i guess.
He said you're out.
So i jus thought maybe you do not want to see me cos of my words...
Supposed to but walked away.

Ya, i went club.
With a insecure feeling.
Happy was happy but i have to.
Cos of yoshi's gf ard, kaylie, vania was ard.
I dun want them see me tis way.
I want to be fine in front of them...

B4 club jason did tok to me.
He said i shld give patience, think b4 i spilt it out.
I noe i was wrong...
Countless of times....
I'm being too selfish.
When it happen, i jus guilty, regreted tt make you fall for me.
I dun want to hurt you, yet i keep done it.

I jus want half an hr or even lesser, i dun mind.
Let me see you, let me hug you.
Bcos there is sth, it's real.
I may be lied to you many times b4 but tis isn't lie.
I love you.. Real..
It's hurting me as much when seeing you like tis.
Specially when you jus go missing..

Even if i gt my retribution, if my life will to cut short.
I dun mind at all cos i known you.
The guy who had a cute smile back when i see you.

& i been banned frm coming mon exam.
Due to attendance too low.
Jus want you to see & hear tt....

Bye 20! Hola 21!

2011-01-17T02:28:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 21ST!

After my 1st paper, bus down to town to meet Yvonne & Vania 1st.

Yvonne even bought me a cake.

Then head down to The Cathay meet Vania.

Vania also gt me a gift & tt's a watson's gif card.

HAHAHA! Lil awkward but cute of her getting tt for me. =)

Then baby reached 15mins ltr.

& All of us are starving.

Yoshi called, he came after tt.

We were at the basement 1 having the japanese food.

Ard 9 Marv came too.

Well i have to admit the atmosphere became better.

All of us had a gd laugh.

I hope baby doesnt feel left out.

Baby, i wished to say.

Thank you..

Thank you so much for spending tis to me.

Thank you for the bday song.

Thank you for the wishes

& Thank you for the love.

I noe it's late. But still,

Happy 2nd Month-versary To You.

I misses you.

I want to hug you so badly.

I want to see you how you watching me.

I want to see you smile...

& I love you.

Last day of aged 20 & study

2011-01-16T16:57:00.003+08:00

2mr is the day...
The day of my first 21st, my first paper & our 2nd month anniversary.
Ytd last min out to eat.
Baby treat me cos he said my bday.
Somehow my eyes show him tt i felt lil awkward?
Cos few days ago, he seen me cried & i heard him ... ...
I'm sorry.

After tat, we head back to my home..
Rest awhile, chill awhile.
When baby going back soon, he said: why does time pass so fast?
& I noe baby wan to keep me acc, want to stay wit me.
Myself wan to keep him wit me.
But i cant.
His parents may scold X(

2day's the last of my 20.
I wish for my 21st:
. Family in gd health
. Understand, give in & love my silly day by day
. Travel soon, jus short trip
. New phone
. Get a proper stable job
. While busy, able to generate time for dance
. Lose more kgs -.-

Unable out cos gonna memorise hard for paper 2mr!
Jia You, Jia You!!
But 3 more to go b4 graduate -.-

Weak Mind, Body

2011-01-15T13:33:00.006+08:00

2day was supposed plann to celebrate advance wit him.

To get dress up, to be sweet,to be like a mature..

Take lots of pics to mark tis day.

But all blown out..

Cos of my wrongs.

My life cant seems to do anything rite.

Why am i yelling some1 to give me warmth.

But think it agn.. Nah, i shldnt be selfish.

At some point, i actually cldnt give him wat he wants.

Maybe ... ... If things dun work out, we shall make a decision soon instead of hurting us in & out.

I really have no idea now.

I dun feel like study, dun feel like doing nth.

Jus wish to slp deeply.

I dun wan to wake up to see tis frighten self.

I'm feeling heavy... ...

If only there's sth make me fall deep slp...

Sara Bareilles - Gravity

2011-01-14T14:45:00.000+08:00

Yet Another Day

2011-01-14T14:19:00.005+08:00

Ytd meet up wit baby to tok.

Everything is fine now.

It's me who able to change for the good now.

When will i stop lying?

When will i stop giving empty words?

Will i being honest nxt time?

I felt embarrassing cos i actually tears in front of him.

Rmb every word he wrote in blog, felt i cldnt face him.

I'm sorry..

Alot of things i dun used to voice out.

Maybe cos i jus afraid.

I guess i still nd lil time of my own.

Somehow my mood still lil affected by the words.

& ... ... I nd to get thru myself, my fear, my anger...

Cold, aching i'm feeling still...

Christina Aguilera - Bound to You [HQ Official NEW SONG]

2011-01-13T13:24:00.000+08:00

2011-01-13T12:56:00.001+08:00

I'm nth but a rubbish

2011-01-13T06:43:00.004+08:00

I shld jus go..
My silly thoughts taking me away.
I wan to feel the stab in my body.
Can i jus rip my skin.
Shld i jus disfigure myself.
Ahahaha, i'm jus an ugly bitch.
Okie, i'm going MIA.
In order not to make me cry, i will do sth foolish.
Dun worry, tis is not 1st time.
It jus gonna pain awhile.
It jus a punishment..

1131am
I called him but i didnt tok.
I cldn't slp bcos i tot i was dreaming but not.
It's real.
Jus read the whole blog, earlier cldnt bring myself to cos jus afraid how awful u gonna wrote ab me.
I'm a liar, I'm a pain.
He would have said all tis bcos he seen me, tis is the way how i am to them.
I'm wrong...
Each time..
I bringing pain to him instead of love.
I gt soo much bad side of me, tt makes him detest me, dislike me.
My chest hurts, heart numb.
Eyes are swollen, crying the whole morning.
I shut myself inside the doors & jus cry it out silently.
When no one's at home, i jus let it out.
I guess tis is the ugliest part of me..

Rmb, i told u i gt my family prob to say it to you.
I jus write it here cos u said u do not wan me to contact u.
- My 2nd sis's accident is me who caused it.
- My parents almost divorced when i am only 8 yrs old, tt time i actually attempt to bring my 2nd sis along to jump jus to solve their prob.
- I'm always in bad terms wit my dad & 2nd sis.
There's once i even argued wit her til she used a knife chop on her palm.
I rmb... Tt time i see a pool of blood, causing few fingers cldnt move.
It hurts me alot when i seen tt scene.
Now i think of it agn, my tears jus flow out agn.

Tis may seems nth for u?
But wat kept me haunting is all tis.
I afraid of seeing myself.
I tend to cant see my journey clear.
Wat my thinkings are always keep me foolish, act as if i understand.
Now u will noe i'm really jus a pain.
If u think u unable to cont wit me, jus speak.

Whether u will belief anot..
Yes i fell for u, i still love u now.

218pm
Maybe ... ...
I'm a person full wit lies, a person living in anger & fears.
A person u cant entrusted me wit ur heart anymore.
A person u wldn't put the miss or love word on me.
Jus bcos to u, I'm mayb jus a fake.
Nth true.
Nth real.
Yes i gt alot of wrong doings but u doubt my love.
I will to say i'm a person who's nt mature enough.
Dun understand other's feelings.
Ya, i seems to priority frens than u & family.
They noe me better, tt's the only i have to say.
I had lil issues wit my dad in the past & times i kinda ill-treat my sis.
I dun have my own anger management.
But after i do reliase i'm wrong, i owe them.
I wan to give everything back to them.

I changed for 2day who i am bcos wat i been thru in very previous r/s.
I'm sorry to say I'll think guys jus wan sth more than love.
Rmb? Forever is jus a lie.
No such thing as happy endings.
I may said things in positive but myself in a negative.
I'll bear tis blame, tis wrongs, mistakes bcos i never like myself.
I'm jus going for sth tt makes me feel better.

My empty words hurt u so bad.
Tat keeps me thinking.
Mayb someday soon, tis will be the end.
I wont blame u but myself.
Ya, i brought tis upon myself.
I'll noe tt it might not last.
Sorry, i'm jus an empty shelf...
Who dun noe how to think but pain & prob to u.

Another 1 more wk

2011-01-10T12:30:00.004+08:00

My hell is here, supposed to get start for studying but cldnt get my mind to.
Ytd went to shop for CNY clothes?
Cos my mum asked me to.
Bought a shorts, a pants & a top.
My dad paid it 1.
My mum mentioned tis : see ur dad treat you all so nice, buy everything for you.
She asked me to repay him back.
Then my dad smiled..

Suddenly my mind flashed back.
Wonder frm every each of the lessons did i learn?
Am i growing up?
When gonna reach the age of 21, i see another world, have another mindset of thinking.
Tis only can be find out at the later part of journey.

Baby's sch reopen, back to his sch dragging wit the "sian-ness".
Jia you baby, 1 & half month to go..
& soon, another part of ur new journey starting frm there.

Stressing Weeks To Come

2011-01-07T15:42:00.004+08:00

Last day of sch.
Feel sianz cos of the exams.
I told myself gonna do better for the 1st paper cos it's my bday.
Gonna trash the paper & own it!

Okie let's rewind tis post back on wed:
My attitude was whole f*ck up.
Made baby mad.
X(
He must be v upset.
Like wat he blogged.
He was sian-ed & tired.
& i tot i offended him cos of my ruthless attitude.
Ya, Charles keep offering him drinks.
& told me: y m i keep sticking wit my bf?
Go out there dance... ...
I said nah, dun wan bcos i dun like seeing baby tis way.
I wan to keep him acc.
When the club near to closing, i danced retro & ya...
Finally, he smiled. =)
Baby as i always said..
I love the way you smile.
No matter how ugly i look, i jus wishes you to smile happily.

Thurs..
Slept 4 or 5 hrs.
Awaken by baby's sms
He went to poly open hse, carrying body wit 2hrs of slp.
After tt, i 'invited' him to my place. LOL
Haha, my mum asked him whether is he gonna stay over to have dinner.
1 thing i'm glad ab is they finally tok-ed.
HAHA.
Then baby was too tired, he dozed off while watching La Pi Xiao Xin.
... ... i snapped pic of him aslp!
Not gonna post up cos it's for me to c only.
X)
& rest of the nite, we jus spent to cuddle each other.
Feels comfortable & warm.

Fri... Also 2day...
Went to sch, after tt head to bugis to walk ard.
Bumped into danny, my bro!
So long nv c him!
Here comes a quest whereas he always asked:
Y m i always alone walking ard??
Looks soo lonely..
I jus -.-
HAHA..
Well it's okie, i get used of it alr.
& i acc-ed him to sim look at his electronic stuffs.
All the way, he jus pat my head!
-.-
He treated me drink too cos of thank me acc him.
=)
Pam called him & he told her tt he bump into me.
Then ... ...
He passed me the phone & she asked me the same quest as Danny.
Double -.-!
LOL
Somehow feels tt they are the true frens i noe.
Urge to hugging my baby now.
Meeting him ltr, i'll jus wait & expecting.
Gonna off to prepare for dance.
Great wkends!

Baby, I love you too.

It's 5th in Jan

2011-01-05T12:13:00.003+08:00

God...
Like silly said: humans are unpredictable.
I really seen another 1 true faces.
To think she's like the only fren i get along wit in class.
I understand she do helped me alot.
But when i asked her for exam tips, alr noe & shld tell me, not jus keep saying 'dun noe or haven'.
I noe tis has to blame tt i did not turn up for sch.
It jus really makes me mad, DAMN.
Sitting beside her, yet she keep turning her back towards me & tok to others.
Nvm, it's okie.
Cos i only jus nd to bear 1 more day.
Thankful tt tis is the last term & i wont be seeing such 'frens'.
I almost deceived by ur looks agn, jus lucky tt i seen it early!

Gonna dance my heart out ltr & 2mr start preparing notes for exams.
Baby ytd learnt dance frm me, taught him some basics of hip hop.
A lucky thing tt i do have patience to teach.
Meaning: i dun wan to get mad either, jus wan teach him slow & detail.
Baby you can do it! =)
Will recap the steps wit you agn in someday soon!!
Better practise!

Exams jus in less than 2wks time, same goes to my bday.
Hopefully, i'll grow better frm the new 21's life.
Well, gonna rest now!
To be blog agn! Cheerios!

【ShareMTV】吴克群爱太痛

2011-01-02T16:31:00.000+08:00

01/01/11 Bad Day

2011-01-02T02:15:00.004+08:00

Not a very good beginning in 2011, does tt mean my rest of the 364days will be hard times?
Not refering tt being wit him was bad but myself dun feel gd.
Instinct felt sth bad might happen.
Temper bad, attitude rude, actions rough.
Baby dun like it.
I'm being too childish & playful alr.
He's rite, i'm going 21, i shld have the 21 look, everything.
Somehow jus feels lil upset.

I dun feel like toking, I dun feel like doing anything.
Feel like nd to calm down.
I getting too emotional agn.
I hate tis? It sounds like i only care ab myself.

I guess i actually dun understand myself when i claim to understand alot.
I'm sorry.

2011-01-01T13:51:00.002+08:00

HAPPY NEW YR!!
HAVE A BLESS YR AHEAD!!! =)
May Joyful & Happiness Fills Our Everyday!

Christina Aguilera - The Voice Within

2010-12-31T01:59:00.000+08:00

Another last day of the yr

2010-12-31T01:25:00.003+08:00

Agn, for the past 20yrs of last days of my life is ab to go.
Nxt yr, I wished for a better yr.
A yr tt i'm gonna continue to grow up, to learn, becoming better.
As always, the ones who give birth me, my parents, Thank you mummy & papa.
I had experienced so much in tis 20yrs & time flies so fast.
Be patient, i'm gonna carry tis responsiblity soon, you 2 wont be suffer.

Baby, though it's only less than 2 months we had been tgt.
But i'm looking forward to a yr anniversary or 2 or maybe 3.
I hope things between us will get better.
Arguements get us more understanding.
Everyday fill up with all the misses.
Baby, i love you.
1 thing i had given you for 1st time.
I dun call my ex(s) baby b4 cos i find it mushy & i cant bring myself too.
You're the 1st guy i called. :)
Better be proud huh! =x

& baby you were cute last nite.
1st time been to my place, nervous ab meetin my parents.
(well, everyone have tt too includes me -.- )
My mum said tis agn,
Treat you better, stick wit you & no more bfs after you.
=)
It may sounds early but slowly, we will find out.

2day, another day baby & i welcoming new yr.
Hope for better ard us.
Hope for safety & healthy for parents.
& hope for more of tis occasions to celebrate with my boy.
Anyway,
Happy New Yr Eve Guys!

Kelly Clarkson - Already Gone

2010-12-31T00:12:00.000+08:00

Joyful X'mas

2010-12-26T23:26:00.005+08:00

Had x'mas dinner wit baby's family.
Food was great but nv eat much.
Baby keep nagging X(
Then drank red wine & baby said no hard liquor for me.
I promised him no hard liquor for rest of the nite. X)
He asked : nt rest of the life meh?
Hee hee!
Suddenly it came to my mind & i jus asked baby.
So you gonna watch me the rest of my life?
=D
But he nv ans me .... .... -.-

After dinner, head home changed & out to club.
Danced awhile, alr felt bored.
Whole nite jus hugged baby.
Baby sent me home when club going close.
=D

2day nv meet up wit baby cos we both are too tired.
Called baby jus now tok ab planning come my place to greet my parents.
Baby is cute cos he was soo nervous.
Guess he was thinking how to "encounter". =x
Pics are out. Look awful X(
... .... ... blah blah...
Baby said still gt nxt x'mas.
Then i asked for the rest of the life x'mas?
He said it's possible.
*sweets* =)

Feeling tis is a Honeymood period now.
Noe it's late but it's best for tis occasions.
Sorry baby if i hurt you when hugging you too tight. =x

Merry Merry Christmas!

2010-12-25T10:21:00.003+08:00

Morning!!!
God! Had only 3hrs of slp, i'm so damn shag now.
Wanted go for jogging, think forget it.
If nt, ltr i'll even more shag.
Flu in a morning ain't better too, stuff tissue into my nose -.-
Full of blisters on toes cos of last nite wore new heels.

Last nite was usual one, jus tt it's festival & a great warming kind tt my baby made.
I think my baby love my lens cos it's pink??
HAHA
Then i camwhore bit, & baby said my photos was actting cute -.-
Well... ... I dun deny tt =x
Cos gals mah...
Catch a movie at 1155, Little Fockers.
AHAHA, the show was great but i was yawning away at some prt.
Freaking funny!
"God-Focker."
"My home is at your heart?"
Plus the youtube one!
X)
Hmmm, i guess my baby must be thinking i looking great last nite, the top i wore must be attracted him.
=x
Hee Hee baby, jus you wait..
1 day... Soon.. X)

Heading x'mas dinner wit baby's family ltr..
Gonna reach his place at 3 ltr.
I better get my ass out to prepare alr otherwise will late.

Merry Christmas agn peeps!

2010-12-24T14:51:00.003+08:00

EARLY MERRY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE!!

Lost

2010-12-23T23:41:00.005+08:00

Here goes another yr of x'mas.
Every1 on the str must be feeling happy, excited ab tis coming festival.
Well, i'm not.
Instead feeling lost...
I noe all begins wit me last nite, i gave a cold shoulders & board the train.
Now i'm entirely break-down.
I wan to walk away.
To a place where i can cry out loud.

I will jus say I do not wan to spend tis x'mas.

Bcos i'm not smiling at all.
Merry X'mas Eve to All..

No idea

2010-12-23T01:14:00.006+08:00

Moodless?
Dun feel like toking or doing anythin.
Jus feel like dance.
I understand your words & dun worry.
I'm not being upset.
I'm sorry tt i rush everything, making you confused.
It's okie if all tis are to restart all over agn.
But maybe i nd time on my own 1st, so now thoughts wldn't run wild, mind wldn't feel whirl, mood wldn't be tt emo.
When you start asking yourself tt m i taking tis r/s seriously, it meant you are having doubts on me.
Sometimes you have to understand, boy gal frens still have their own privacy.
I'm not referring anything, jus telling you.
You noe i dun check ur phone, dun ask you to report me anything bcos i noe it's suffocating for guys.
I dun ask for more nor less.
Simple hugs, care is enough for me.
If me bringing you insecure, how can you continue?
Give yourself a thought properly ab it.
I wont hurry you as love cannt be forced.

1225pm:

Felt mind whirled.

Cldn't get to slp.

Dun feel like toking at all.

I wonder... ...

Am i always a gal who make ppl carry doubts on me?

I'm sorry to say tt i maybe more clique wit guys than gals but seriously to say i'm nt interested in any of my guy frens. If i will to like them, it will happened way back b4 when 1st noe them.

If you may still think i dun take tis r/s seriously, i wldn't blog, post pics or even tok to my frens ab you.

Like you mention b4, i can easily get a guy but i dun wish to cos i like you, i love you.

Sorry, jus tt i nd time on my own for 2day.

I'm really clueless of wat to do... ...

I cant even think properly...

I wanna Zoo Zoo Zoo!!!

2010-12-22T01:16:00.003+08:00

Late for class & it ended early.
Head down to woodlands waiting for them.
HEE HEE, We went ZOO!!!

Was in super hyper mood, said & done a lot crazy stuff.
Baby jus gave me tis look : -.- or o.o!
Haha.
Great afterall cos they laughed, real hard too.
It's a glad tt seeing them so happy. =D
Disturbed my baby jus by : Mmehh, Mmehh =x
But the goats stink so much! -.-
Eewww!!
Well, during the journey, pics will jus do the toking.
Though i been zoo like dun noe how many million times
But tis trip still make the worth while =)
I will go pay visit Mr panda in 2012 wit baby..
As promised :)

After zoo, headed down to amk for dinner & movie.
Had sinful meals 2day, supposed to cut down but instead gaining!!!
Baby told me tis : I like is you, not your figure.
X)
Aaww!
I love you, baby!
2day all your words jus saved into my memory =D

Out for ab 14 hrs, now i'm jus soo dead tired, only wit 2hrs rest.
Gonna head to bed!
Pics will be upload 2mr??
Nites!

Moody Ruin It Agn

2010-12-19T01:42:00.004+08:00

DAMN, mood was total ruin.
A sudden temptation for 'it' besides club & dance.
But I'm gonna control.
Marv said it rite.
"Dun do for any1 but ur self... ... ... ..."

Mood gt lil bad after toking to him.
Miscommunication? Untrustable? Or ?
I rmb my words if nt i wldnt called & clarify.
I'm sorry i'm being lil rude but pls dun try give me a assuming tt i might seems to be lying.
I am not tired of meeting you everytime.
It jus tt i dun like seeing you being so unhappy, you clearly noe i gt dance, & you will be by yourself in tt 1 hr time.
& you mentioned you felt tt way when your bored.
So i might as well asked you rest at home or hang out wit your frens.
My words dun meant anythin, seriously cos sometimes i really dun noe how to break it & tell you.
Pls do not get it wrong.
Dun think too much, alrite?

And ... ...
Ab tt time i told you :
My mum asked me dun switch anymore bfs, jus stick with you.
Then you will saying :
See how i treat you.
My mind was like 'Huh?'
I dun wan to misunderstand any of your words & i hope we do tok ab tis.
We dun tok, otherwise we cant stable tis r/s.
Thank you.

Note: I noe i'm nt a better gal for you, i may not appear to-be-a-nice-gal in your mind too.
I'm jus honestly ans you everything alr but pls dun assume i'm the past me.

Another Great Evening Spent

2010-12-17T01:59:00.004+08:00

Last evening was agn spent with my baby.

went vivo for walk, chill.

Seeing baby smile agn, mood felt happy too.

Pic-ing the whole time too.

Although jus short few hrs but stil great nite out X)

2day's 17th.

A month b4 where we had our 10th date?

& it all happens in club where the nite i stole his 1st kiss =x

Okie, tis is soo embarrassing!

But baby, ...

I'm still here open my arms for you.

Loving you day by day =)

Happy 1st month-sary to you!

Great Accompany Passed With FLying Colors

2010-12-15T00:31:00.003+08:00

Ytd was a great day.
Met up wit baby after my lesson & followed him to sch for his attachment thingy.
Well, his frens disturb him bcos he gt a gf?
HAHA well it was really LOL.

After tt, he supposed to get a haircut...
But ... ... the hairstylist he wan to get cut frm had alr resigned..
So we jus went to baby's hse str. =x
Seen his parents, wonder did i leave a gd impression & i had long chat wit his mum. X)
Soo yepp..
Ooh YA! & the 'baby' he toking ab is really awfully cute!!!!
OMG!
I loved the 'baby'! =D
My baby is jealous of him. XD
He gave me food instead to my baby.
Also fed me & kissed me X)
HAHA! Sooo ADORABLE!
AWWW~~
But, baby u got a tongue cheek kiss frm the 'baby' is gd enough!
Dun complain =x
HAHAHAHAH

After went over his place for 1st visit, we went for movie.
Narnia...
The show was average?
Hmmm.. Ya, we loiter ard b4 we went home?

& to my surprise, trying my luck if i receive my results.
YEAH, i did!!!
I PASSED!!
Phew!
I'm so glad & happy tt acc my bf the whole day.
He been making effort to keep acc me too.
I'm really blessed now =)
Baby thank you for all the sweet moments 2day.

photos will be upload ltr! Am tired! X(

ni yao de ai - penny dai pei ni

2010-12-14T01:06:00.000+08:00

Babe Misses Baby

2010-12-13T00:31:00.003+08:00

X) It's been days.
My baby initiated to meetup ltr after his work.
Sooo ... ...
He's missing me alot alot! =D
Suddenly gt hyper for no reason.
But somehow i misses his hugs , how i look UP to him. -.-

Hmmm... Jus a v short post, random...
Baby, i wish to be in ur arms everynite. =3
Fullstop!
Nites! XD

Gong Shi Jia - Zai Yi Ci Yong You

2010-12-12T04:21:00.000+08:00

阿桑_叶子

2010-12-12T04:11:00.000+08:00

Another 13more days to X'mas

2010-12-12T02:44:00.003+08:00

Cldnt slp, seems to be thinking somethin but nth at all.

Dyin to travel, go for short getaway trip after CNY.

Nth much to blog too, ltr meetin Yvonne to out agn.

So ya... ...

A Stay-at-home wkends

2010-12-11T01:13:00.004+08:00

After dance, nt actually directly head home.
Ya, my baby was shocked & tis silly actually happy.
Haha, How adorable.
Jus dun wan admit tt all the while he mind me goin club.
SILLY!
But i gave him my words tis time, 2nite & 2mr i will nt go.
So i'll jus make myself worn out not to even have temptations to go. =D

Suddenly misses my days out wit my gal, eg. Childhood fren Hazel.
She been crazily chasing over some idol & out wit her frens til forgotten me. -.-
She only ask me out is when she feel like sing k.
Funny huh.
It means i'm nth jus a singing partner? WOAH
At least Yvonne's better.
She really recognised me as a fren but lately she's busy wit her stuff..
Sooo ya...
NVM! I'm gonna date myself out for walk.. X)
My silly must be worry sick cos i'm on my own.
It's okie baby, i'm alrite, ppl always have tendancy of walking alone. =)

Baby, i started misses you
I wann to slp in ur arms.
Hug me close when i'm cold...
I noe ... ... You will say the same as i do.
Sry i keep falling sick, never keep my words..
I'll become better person for my own sake.
X)
It's time to work harder!

Rabbids can't stand christmas

2010-12-10T02:23:00.000+08:00

AHAHAHA OMG!

Pig trotter look alike on my ankle side

2010-12-07T09:52:00.004+08:00

Fever last nite after my dance.
Pain, itchy & swollen ankle.
Now even worse, nv go to sch.
tis time walking is limp, stubborn me still went for dance.
Morning stil ate oreo, ended up even bad cough, anytime might trigger my asthma attack.
Shit, i'm too unwell to go anywhere..

1155am,
stupid ant or bee, of all y you like my leg -.-
Lucky not serious prob.
But cosst me 36$!
I only left wit 5$ now.
ZZZzzz!
Heck care alr, meeting my baby boy ltr. =D
He gonna give me lotsa love =x
& nagging too.
Haha...
But well, in repaying his love, gonna whip him a dinner.
MUAHAHAHA~

Foreseen Hell Week Ahead

2010-12-06T13:18:00.003+08:00

Gonna start my dance training & work on assignments.
Lucky i only have to do a small part for each 4 assignments & tt's all.
Had tis bad cough wit me since 2 or 3wks ago?
Wonder how many ppl will get infected frm me...
Lucky my silly is strong enough, otherwise his sick never gets better. -.-
Ya, he must be scolding..
"cough for 2wks plus alr still haven gt better, still dun wan to c doc or eat med..."
RITE silly?
I roughly noe wat you gonna nag ab? =x
HEE HEE!
I will tc myself, dun worry =D
It's gonna recover soon too...

Had my room tidy 2day cos mayb 2mr my silly might be dropping by awhile due to some being followed incident.
Well, nt actually follow, dun noe how to put it but definitely terrified experience.
It's not only happened once but few times, jus tt was way yrs back ago in my old hse.
Yep, nth much.
Mood feeling blessed =)
Hyper active too..
HEH HEH!

Okie dokey.
Fullstop for the post now~

Bruno Mars - Grenade [Official Music Video]

2010-12-05T07:51:00.000+08:00

Smile & Sorry

2010-12-05T07:01:00.003+08:00

Almost cry.

But I chose to hold back bcos it ain't nice to cry out.

I'm gonna keep smiling.

Dream with the thoughts of future, smile with how many memories will be create.

Ya... ...

Tat's the end for the post for now.

I'm jus gonna camp under my blanket & soar in my thoughts.

P.S freaking NR7 made me & Marv waited an hr & it didn't came, in the end ... ...

walked to somerset wait for the 1st train.

DAMN the bus driver.

No Title For The Day

2010-12-04T01:20:00.003+08:00

Hmmm.. Had great dance lesson 2nite, felt alot to buck up on.
Going another hip hop class 2mr at noon as in ltr.
Cos Gatsby competition is drawing nearer.
Needed get my basics better.

Feeling bit weird.
Is tis emo doing it agn?
Read silly's status in FB.
"... ... dun have a day off", sounds like i'm suffocate him.
"Tired both mentally & physically... "
Hmmm... ...
Guess it will be better tt dun meet him on coming sun.
It's a wise to let him rest more or mayb do some catch up wit his frens.
I'll be okie if i'm alone doing shopping for my notebook.
I'll be alrite silly.
Sorry if i'm being selfish, jus keep you to myself.
Shld ought to let you have a breather.

Okie, i needed calm my emotions now b4 thoughts start running wild agn.
Nites!

Smiling Of HIs Cuteness

2010-12-03T14:39:00.003+08:00

Jus a short post.
Baby Boy, wherever you go, i'll always be hugging you.
But if there's things you want to do, jus go ahead to.
Like going travel, etc ... ...
Jus rmb tell me tt.
Not asking you report me, jus give me a pice of rest assured mind.
Sorry, if i'm being too much or sth.

Felt bad tt ytd nv cook for you, gt the urge to cook for you.
Almost forgetting 2day & 2mr wont b meeting you, so have to wait til sun.
Soo Silly baby, pls wait!
Sun will be arriving soon & even longer time to spend. =D
I'll be seeing you ard.
Aishiteru X)

Creepy short film from Pixar's Rodrigo Blaas.

2010-12-03T10:29:00.000+08:00

A Happening Night

2010-12-02T14:26:00.003+08:00

Last nite was a wow.
Jason's bday but alot of our frens in scandalous nite, I jus stand & watched.
I was high but ni'm nt drunk.
Gained my awakeness like soo soon after?
Dirty dance wit yvonne, kimmi?
& whole nite, i jus kept touching and kissing them, my god~
Almost turn into les. -.-
Bought Jason a slice of cake too, thought of surprise him.
But ... ... he saw it b4 i do surprise him -.-
But then agn, he was soo touched til he tears. =D
I noe wat is the feeling of some1 jus suddenly popp up wit a cake when you dun actually receive 1 for soo many yrs.
I have to say, it may nt be the best gift but at least an unforgettable bday. X)

Yvonne asked me to help her get a guy.
I said i cant cos i gt tis silly boy & i noe he will jealous, i jus told her to ask kimmi?
Well, back at the table, things start to happened.
Haha, to my clique, tis is nt gonna b avoidable nxt time for u guys!
You guys are seriously in doom shit~

Meetin my silly ltr, tell him the stories of last nite's..
So ya............

My Baby Boy :)

2010-11-30T01:19:00.002+08:00

My day goes same as usual,
sch, home, slp & dance..
Wat's making my day happier is my silly.
Although it jus smses but it still keeps my day beautiful =)
Now I jus wishes to slp beside him & feeling him hugging me.
Soon, the day gonna pass, esp most of the time when i spending wit him, seems always pass even faster, it jus diff frm when i'm in sch X(
Nvm, there's always someday i can spend the entire day wit him or mayb days? =D

D/l few movies, wanna watch wit him when we had nth much to do but actually all the while we been doing nth much, it still keep us busy.
My time for him is jus only watching him smile, eat, drink.
=)
I'll never get sick of & I'm always expecting tis day each time after we met up.

New Notebook PC & Great Date!

2010-11-29T02:02:00.003+08:00

YIPEEE!!!

My dad bought me a new notebook at 599$ at SITEX =D

Small & convenient but sucks is no mircosoft! X(

Cos wanted use tt to do my assignments. Soo ya.

But thank you lao pa for buying me 1 & feeding me for 20 yrs long!

I'll earn more in future to repay you back!

& my silly boy~

He's getting sweet!!!

Ohmm Nomm Nomm! X)

All the smses wit the babe, my girl is making me smile like a silly dumb dumb.

But silly, if i ever make you feeling uncomfortable or upset, do tell me.

I'm still sorry ab my words 2days ago, I mistook your words.

I'm always here even if you did not fall for me in the 1st place, we still can be frens.

Jason mentioned to me tis b4: if we cant become lovers, can always become frens.

Rite now at v tis moment, i wishes every min, secs to be in your arms.

Every of your words, smses caught me smiling & goin thru "madly in love" with you.

Despite wat might happen in the future, rmb we had tis love.

Then on, i'll continue to work on tis r/s esp in our miscommunications, put our emo feelings aside & step by step walk towards you receiving even more greater days. =)

Lists i wishes to do with you:

- Understands us better

- Taking public transport with you ><

- Travelling tgt

- Slping beside you

- More hugs & kisses X)

- Etc ... ...

Sounds lil silly to ya huh?
It may sounds simple, still i want to always mark tis in my journey,

not wit any1, not comparing wit any ex but you, my silly.

You cannot be compare, you're not a replacement.

As there's only 1 Daryl I noe, I love, I misses.

( Sorry my silly baby, times i do not noe how to use my words, may convert into mistaken meanings, dun go disappear agn, i'll be at lost, dun noe wat can i do to make you feel better, happy. I love you, my silly baby boy.. )

Emily Go Away, Jus Go Far Frm Here

2010-11-27T11:19:00.004+08:00

Fell aslp but keep waking up..
Saw the sms...
Feeling even worse...
Am I in wrong?
How do i speak for myself?
Am i mistook any of it?
ARRRHHH!
I wan to cry out loud, I wan to let it out..
Suddenly I jus misses how he told me..
:" you're nt alrite "
& he hugs me...

Sorry i'm being useless... ...
My hands are cold, I'm feeling tired...........
Ya, my past is soo disgusted..
Every mistakes/hurt will change a person to react differently in future.

Can i jus go?
Go to a place where i dun suppose belong?
Go to a place where nobody noe i'm crying?

2nd post at 128pm
He replied..
A long msg written sorry & clear the misunderstandings.
Deep down feel touched but sad cos my words must be hurting him in someway.
He wants to drink..
Jus go ahead silly if tt makes you feel better ?
I'm sorry if i mistook your words.
I was upset but I felt even more guilty bcos of my harsh words.
You dun have to become better but speak your feelings out.
I ever told you tis b4,
If i say anything tt hurts or offended you, dun hold back, spilt it out.
I wan to noe you better, understand you well.
Most but nt least, your smiles, maintain it as how i always see you.
It's not the real reasons of jus your smile but deep down inside, y are you smiling for.
I love you, silly.
I never stop misses your warmth, your hugs.
You may not be the perfect love but some1 wit tis simple feeling i been yelling frm.

Pls Dun Judge Frm Past

2010-11-27T05:05:00.002+08:00

I'm really totally upset..
I jus cant understand.
Am i getting no respect?
Even i tok-ed to Marv & Jason, they find it lil ridiculous too.
Do you even noe for the whole nite i was faking smile?
They even keep telling me tt dun think too much but i cant help it.
The smses are definitely hurting, i'm feelin chest pain.
I haven eaten for the whole entire day when earlier wants to but lose my appetite.
Ya, i experienced gastrics, so?
It dun cure my mood.
I noe i may sound harsh in tis post.
But it dun get us anyway if you continue to think me as tis sort of person.

Tell me, is tis even gd start?
My gals tot i'm gonna cry but i will not.
I'm tired of tear-ing...
I had a random foolish thought earlier.
Think ... ...
Forget it, i wont say.

Okie, I cldnt slp neither feel like eating.
I'm jus gonna re-read the smses & keep blaming myself.
Y am i tis way last time..
Y do i even make you love me..
To many ppl, i'm nth but jus a trash.
Do they even fucking noe me?
Do they even fucking noe when all your frens betrayed you & jus leave you alone?
Even teacher told my closest fren to stay away frm me.
Do you even noe most of the times i'm crying bcos not falling out of love but bcos of my family?
I'm been giving my parents tough time & my 2nd sis ... ...
TELL ME, DO YOU GUYS EVEN NOE ME?
I always had tis bottled up, suffocate.
I dun compare, i dun have any misfortunate.
I felt glad bcos i noe really few great frens, noe-ing my parents still continue support & care.

I end the post here, tt's all..
No more any other words coming frm my mouth even whoever quest me.
I'm done of sharing here.

Watching you smile also making me smile

2010-11-26T00:14:00.003+08:00

Been in deep emo shit mood last few days...
But last nite after tok to Jason feeling soo much better.
Comes to make me realising sth.
Rite in front of my eyes, I shld jus treasure wat i have & be content wit.

Silly,
we shall walk tis steps slowly, understand each other even better.
I never wan to rush things on you bcos to me, you are real, you are a true.
Watching you smile is also part of my happiness, Feeling you hugging me close & tight is the most warmest now.
& We both noe tt in our hearts, we smile the cutest. X)

Maintain tis way, I noe there's always bitter part coming but rmb our words, we are always there.
Although tis is nt the 1st r/s i been thru but you actually can get me blushing for most of the times.
I'm just ... ... Totally mad in love wit you. :)

I'm Dwelling On Past Agn

2010-11-23T14:53:00.004+08:00

Mayb somethings may like to jus keep to myself.
Forgive me if somedays i'm actually faking to be fine.
Jus bcos i dun wan u to see me tis way...

Pls trust me, stand by me.
If every1 will to despite u but u dun.
It's kinda heart-breaking whenever i'm seein tis scene replay agn.
Ppl may said i'm falling in love too easily/fast, i dun mind bcos they dun noe me.
But how ab others tt i treat them as frens?
You guys noe me the best, seen the real me, will you even look down on me?

There's always a time tt i will wan to cry out but cann no longer do so.
I hold too much of tears in myself, dun noe how to let it out now.
Every of sec, i'll have my fear.
Maybe the fear of standing alone?

I dun noe ... ...

2010-11-21T10:50:00.002+08:00

Ytd supposed to be a gd day.
But ended up i let tis emo shit ruin my day.
I actually gt every1 worried.
Marv, Robin, Jason, My silly & actually Yvonne too.
I almost gonna do somethin like jus going MIA.
I nd to think properly ab my actions.
Am i being too selfish? Or petty?

Well last nite, my silly's arrival totally surprised me.
Thought he wouldn't come upon seein his arrival, i jus ran over hug him.
It seems like i'm gonna cry but I cant rmb how to cry.
He actually came down for me jus bcos i'm upset.
I felt glad... ...

When going back tt time, Marv tok to me ab some stuff.
Really felt touched bcos my tis idiot buddy seems to be tryin do somethin for me.
Sorry guys, I noe i'm still young, alot of things still no experience, to somethings i'm still 1-sided seein it, hopefully i jus learnt & be more grown up.

Post End Here.
Feel like taking nice walk along somewhere quiet since the weather is nice?
Anyway, Thank You Silly & other fellow friends too.

Officially tgt on 17th Nov

2010-11-18T16:20:00.005+08:00

Hee Hee.

Let me officially intro tis silly monkey..

Name is Daryl, Nick: Silly Monkey or Polar Bear

He's a yr younger than me.

He has a adorable smile :)

He is tall. -.-

He's skinny but in future he will b fat. X)

He do not noe how to cycle & roller blading jus like me =D

He drink 2 bottle of plain water every per each day cos i nag him to do so

Dun think he's blur lookin but he's definetely the smart kind unlike me. X(

Well, i'm his cuddly bear now cos he loves to hug me. =)

Me? I jus run over to him & hug him even tight. XD

I'm happy now, every morning my guinea pig get to c a giant hopping ard. LOL

Anyway, .... ... I'm his gal & he's my big boy.

FullStop

Things happened in a nite

2010-11-17T13:51:00.005+08:00

Well, last nite went out to rebel.
Meeting Jason, Marv, Robin & Silly.
=D Well sweetest things happened btwn us..
><
Aiya! I'm shy agn!
(IDIOT BLOG, Cut My Sentences Agn!)

Club ends, we all ready to head home & he sees me off to bustop =)
Somethin shocking happen..
Jason been caught by police.
It really shocked me, wanted help him, i cant cos i dun wan implicate silly in.
Sorry Jason, as a sis i cldnt do anything to help but u are really 1 stupid ass.
Told u alr, nt to fight, nt to stir trouble, you nv listen.
Tis is Singapore, nt Malaysia!
God~~~~~
Now awaiting his news to be bail out ltr by Marv, i unable do it so cos i'm under 21.
Idiot, of all tis happened.

It's a nite can be rmb wit happy & angry thoughts...
Hopefully everything will be fine now after Jason's incident~
Peace out~

Cute "Real-life-Shrek-Cat" ^^

2010-11-16T17:23:00.000+08:00

AWW!!! ><

•*¨*•.¸¸❤ Ємιℓʏ: ᶫᵒᵛᵉ such an deep affection ❤¸¸.•*¨*•